Day 108

It was just about this time last year when Kat came out. At that time she identified as a trans-woman. Increasingly since then, she identifies as just a woman. There aren’t many people who understand her journey and I have some sense of just how lonely that can be. As her mother, I long to talk with people who understand her struggles, and my own. Last night at a potluck for members of the LGBT community, I met a woman who does research on trans-youth. I told her our story and she reassured me that, although the path is not an easy one, there are trans-people who find a place for themselves in the world. She validated my decision to support Kat unconditionally and empathized with our shared struggle. On the way home I found myself beaming with pride. In spite of all the rejection and abuse Kat endured as a child who did not conform, one who was branded as an outsider, she survived. She didn’t give in to madness or drugs, like so many others. She survived and I know, despite all of my mistakes, I helped her to survive. There have been so many moments when I doubted myself as a parent, tallied my many errors, and lived in fear of the ultimate consequences. For a moment, I was able to put all that aside and recognize the success inherent in getting to this point.